“How trying to be a perfectionist is on a path to eventual disaster!!”
Do you know any control freaks? (perfectionists) I did, both my parents were, and there was no way i could avoid being one myself; (“to start with”). It took a lot of personal growth and discoveries; before i was able to let go; i was in my late 50’s before i stopped beating myself up with self-criticism.
What are we trying to accomplish by trying to be perfect in everything we do? The impossible!! Ever seen a perfect human being? No such thing; the spiritual being is perfect; but not the human being. The perfectionist human being having a Hugh inferiority complex; creates this “perfectionist identity” to cover up the inadequate image they have of themselves. They have to control everything in their lives so no one will find out they are not perfect!!! They never attempt to do anything unless they feel they know exactly how it works.
My mother died of Alzheimer disease; what is Alzheimer; they loose their faculties; totally out of control; is the opposite of control. The greatest fear (subconsciously) of a controlling person is being out of control; that is why they control so fiercely.
Just out of interest; anyone you know who has had Alzheimer disease; if you know them well enough; just check to see if they were very controlling and set in their ways!!! My observations have been that all the people i have know with the disease, were controlling people; interesting isn’t it??
I have written a whole chapter in a book i am writing devoted to this very subject.
Just in summarizing; when you are trying to be perfect in everything you do; you set yourself unachievable goals (perfect) so you never get there. Firstly as i said before there is no such thing as doing things perfectly to a perfectionist; they will always find fault in what ever they do; it will never be good enough for them. They set themselves up for FAILURE; Disappointment; then comes the Inadequacy; and then they can spiral down to any depths; along with depression!!! Unfortunately perfectionists are generally very critical people and judgmental; no one ever seems to measure up; and the person who gets the most criticism is themselves. I have just touched very lightly on this subject; it has been a great part of my life; so i am speaking from my own personal experience. I know what a monkey this can be to contend with; but there is a way to deal with it and free yourself of the curse. By the way there is nothing wrong with wanting to do everything to the best of your ability; there is a big difference.
Well i hope you enjoyed reading my blog; if you have any questions or queries i am only too happy to respond. have a great day full of Joy and happiness; LOL Murray
My next blog will cover how we create a perfectionist identity; my own personal experience; till then; bye for now